The English Language

by Chris | 6 Dec 2007 | No Comments

The English language is a bastard to learn. We all know that. With words such as “cough” and “plough” being spelt the same yet pronounced totally differently, and many other examples of this, and many more in written English. There are also, of course, different pronunciations of the same words based on their context. How many of these below can you read correctly the first time [via Theo Spark]? I bet you can’t manage them all! I didn’t.

  1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
  2. The farm was used to produce produce.
  3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
  4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
  5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
  6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
  7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
  8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
  9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
  10. I did not object to the object.
  11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
  12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
  13. They were too close to the door to close it.
  14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
  15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
  16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
  17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
  18. Upon seeing the tear in the painting, I shed a tear.
  19. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
  20. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Did you manage it?

If native English speakers can’t do it, how can we expect all non-native speakers to?

Categories: Language

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  • Ruthie said:

    For the longest time I thought “row” (as in, argument) was pronounced like “row” (as in, the act of rowing a boat), because I’d never heard it said aloud.

    Interesting list. It’s surprising how hard it is to read these right the first time.

  • Steve_Roberts said:

    1. “dove” is not English, the verb is “dived”
    2. “wind the sail” – what does that mean ?

    If you are saying English orthography is tricky, you are correct, but have you mastered Cantonese pronunciation, or Finnish grammar ?

    Just asking

  • Baht At said:

    1. dove is perfectly acceptable english according to the OED, albeit dived is preferred in the written form

    2. sir is referred to US patent 6581771. More commonly the word used is furl.

  • Abandoning Spelling at The ThunderDragon said:

    [...] is no denying that English is a complicated language. But that’s no excuse for no having kids learn [...]

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